Let's Go For a Walk (How to Leave the House With Twins)

2:00pm Decide you've had enough of trying to stay cool in the house, and you're going for a walk

2:01pm Grab SPF 60 sunscreen out of the bathroom cupboard and commence putting your best wrestling holds to good use to get the boys properly covered.

2:15pm Put on 2 pairs of shoes approximately 4 times each because you have once again been thwarted by children with the uncanny ability to scrunch their fat little feet up into even fatter little fists, making it next to impossible to get their shoes on in the first place.

2:25pm Go downstairs to get the wagon. Place it outside on the driveway. Chase down the cat that has decided she wants to come along on the walk. Go back inside to get the boys.

2:30pm Stuff your pockets with spare keys, cell phone, bugspray and two teething rings to distract the boys from pulling off their sunhats every 5 seconds.

2:35pm Upon going to get the boys, discover that they have both shit their pants, and have once again removed their GD shoes!!!

2:50pm Upon completion of two diaper changes, and putting shoes on for the....9th & 10th time....pick up a boy in each arm and attempt to open the baby gate and get downstairs without being tackled by three dogs who would also like to come along for the walk. Grab your sunglasses and the boys sunhats off of the bench. Place your sunglasses on your head where they are out of reach from grabby hands. Clench the sunhats between your knees as you walk out the door and down the front steps to the wagon.

2:55pm After getting both boys into their respective seats in the wagon, catch the effing cat AGAIN (I really should just leave her outside since she seems to think she is an outdoor cat) and throw her furry ass in the house. Spray both boys and yourself with bugspray to keep the hummingbird sized mosquitoes at bay. Toss the bugspray back in the house and lock the door.

3:00pm FINALLY leave for a walk.

3:15pm After walking around the lake to see the geese, arrive at the park. Take each boy out of the wagon, one at a time, placing them each in a baby swing. Push them several times until their giggles turn into cries because you're paying more attention to the other boy.

3:20pm Load up the wagon and head for home.

3:35pm Get home 5 minutes late for naptime with two hot, crabby babies. Give each of them their sippy cups, remove their sunhats and put them down for a nap.

3:45pm Realize you have forgotten the wagon outside and go out to get it. (At least the cat doesn't make a break for it this time). Take the wagon back downstairs.

3:50pm Grab an iced tea, sit down to blog about your afternoon walk and listen to the cat meowing at the door because she has tasted freedom today, and simply cannot shut-up about it!