Frenemies, and Mompetitors, and Bitches! Oh, My!

I've been thinking a lot lately about friendships, past and present. This got me thinking about the portrayal of friendships in the movies and on TV.

Exhibit A: Now & Then

This movie is wonderful. It teaches us that no matter how much people change, true friends will always be there for each other. Wouldn't it be nice if you could get back together with your best childhood friends every time one of you experienced a major life event. You could hang out in your old tree house, talk about that one magical summer when everything was perfect (or was it?), and get to feel like a kid again. I loved this movie when I was growing up, and still do. It gave me hope that I would always be friends with the girls I grew up with, promises would never be broken and friendships were forever. I have to say that my oldest friend would definitely fit into this category. She was born 1 month & 3 days after I was, our parents were friends, so by default, we were as well. We spent innumerable summers together, got into all kinds of shit and had the time of our lives! We grew apart slightly when my parents separated and we moved to the city. I still see this friend on occasion and we reminisce about the good old days on the "talking swing", the summer she fell off the slide, broke her arm and had to spend a good many days with a plastic bag tied around her cast while we lived in the sprinkler, countless popsicles, her amazing trunk full of dress up clothes, beating up chickens (Disclaimer: no chickens were harmed in the making of these memories) and so on. I still consider her my best friend, but I often wonder if she would consider me in the same category.

Exhibit B: Sex & the City

Look at how much fun they're having! This seems slightly more realistic to me, okay maybe not the shower of flowers (ha!), but as far as the friendships go it seems to hit the nail on the head. Yes, they are all friends, some are better than others, but at the end of the day they all love each other. They have their ups and downs. Sometimes they act like a complete C.U.Next.Tuesday, but they put their own shit aside and make the effort when the effort is needed. It's shows like this that make me wish that I didn't live so far away from my girlfriends so we could get fabulous, go out on the town and drink cosmos like there was no tomorrow. Or, you know, just make a batch of cookies, sit around in our PJs and watch chick flicks because we would all be so exhausted from working, parenting, cleaning, cooking etc. that the mere prospect of getting all dressed up would seem insurmountable, but it wouldn't matter as long as we were spending time together.

Exhibit C: Mean Girls

Now these are some nasty bitches women! I know this is a movie about highschool students, but it (unfortunately) holds true at all ages. A friend of mine recently asked in her Facebook status: "I'm almost 30. Why are there STILL mean girls?". The fact of the matter is that there will ALWAYS be mean girls. In highschool it's a constant battle to be a part of the in crowd, and as adults the frenemies trend continues. You are in constant competition; who has the best job, gets engaged first, gets married first, has kids first...it goes on and on. Women with kids are especially bad for this. I recently heard the term "mompetitors" and it couldn't be more true. God forbid you should let your kids watch TV, eat non-organic/processed foods, eat dirt...they must live in their plastic bubbles so that they are never exposed to anything that could hurt them! It seems like everybody has an opinion on what you should do, both for yourself and for your kids, and if you don't meet their criteria you don't get to be their friend, or worse yet, they'll pretend to be your friend but talk about you behind your back when you're not around.

When it's all said and done I can safely say that there are women in my life that fit into each of these three categories. Some I would die for, others I could take or leave. At the end of the day I try to be the best friend I can, when they need me to be. I just hope that when I need them they'll be there for me in the same way.
And so, I lift my glass to all of my girlfriends and say as Edward Norton's character did in 25th Hour, "champagne for my real friends, and real pain for my sham friends".

xoxo Morgan